How To Send An Anonymous Love Letter (5 Things To Keep In Mind)

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This article was developed via a partnership with BetterHelp.

Falling in and staying in love is an exciting feeling. But it’s not always easy to express your feelings to the one you care about. It puts you in a vulnerable position, and it is not always clear if your crush will reciprocate those feelings.

However, one way to start this conversation is by sending an anonymous love letter. Doing so will make your feelings and intentions known without the awkwardness of an in-person conversation. Furthermore, knowing how they react to an anonymous admirer will make it easier to determine if they are likely to reciprocate those feelings once they know you wrote the letter.

But if you are considering this option, there are a few tips and cautions to consider. Read on for some advice on sending your crush an anonymous love letter.

Be Discreet

Since you want to keep it anonymous, it’s essential to be discreet. This will avoid any public embarrassment or having an in-person conversation about your feelings before you’re ready. Make sure to place the note at a time when you won’t be spotted by your crush or a random passerby.

You also want to choose a location for the letter that will be discreet but not stalkerish. For example, sending a letter in the mail might seem creepy if your crush never told you their address. Instead, you may want to try sending an anonymous message through a social media platform (preferably one where they won’t know your identity right away). Or, you can try slipping the note into their locker or hire someone to deliver it for you.

Don’t Go Overboard

Though you may be eager to express your feelings and connect with your crush, make sure to take it slow. Just start with one letter and see how it is received. You don’t want to overwhelm them with too many letters or gifts as it can scare them away.

Don’t Use The “L” Word

Though you may have intense feelings for your beloved, it’s important to take things slow. Therefore, it is wise not to mention the word “love.” This could be a bit overwhelming for them, especially since they don’t know who you are.

So make sure to write about your feelings in a way that is not overwhelming. Tell them how you feel and what you like about them. But don’t pressure them to be in love with you or to make a commitment yet. Take it slow and give them time to find out who you are and reciprocate those feelings.

Avoid Creepy Behavior

You don’t want to come off as a creep or a stalker. Therefore, avoid following your beloved around or saying anything in your letter that can come off as creepy. Likewise, don’t follow them around or use shady tactics to find out more information about them.

Furthermore, though you are undoubtedly attracted to them, keep this information brief in your letter. After all, there is no easier way to freak someone out than discussing your physical attraction with too much detail. Instead, focus on the person’s qualities, hobbies, accomplishments, and anything else you admire about them.

Be Respectful Of The Outcome

Writing and sending an anonymous love letter is both romantic and vulnerable. However, that doesn’t mean that your love will be receptive to your words and advances. Perhaps they already have a partner, or they just aren’t interested in a relationship.

However they respond, it is important to respect their wishes. If they are interested in meeting you and talking further, then that’s wonderful. But if they aren’t interested, then don’t retaliate or do anything harmful to them. Don’t push them into anything. Just respect their feelings and move on.

For more love advice as well as information about other relationship and mental health topics, check out the resources provided by BetterHelp.

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  1. avatar
    chelsea says:

    Very helpful. My crush (hadnt told him yet) felt sorry for me bc i had surgery, so i made my move and put the note on the desk where he sits. But….. when he read it, he looked over at me and beckoned to the note, blushing. Lol we are bf and gf now- ty so much

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